Who are the Blessed?

Blessed are the poor in spirit 

For they will inherit the kingdom of God

That’s not me Lord, my life is too good

Things have gone too well, too long

Blessed are those who mourn 

For they will be comforted 

Do I really mourn for any length or reason?

Distracted at every turn, I think not

Blessed are the meek

For they will inherit the earth 

Meek?? Can I be any more self centered 

In my thoughts and poorly veiled pride 

Blessed are those who thirst for righteousness 

For they will be satisfied 

Does it count if I have a personal agenda 

Tied to most of my actions? 

Blessed are the merciful 

For they will be granted mercy 

I shudder to think of how God

Will judge all my grudges that I hold so quietly 

Blessed are the pure of heart

For they will see God

Maybe this explains why I’ve been 

Screaming for His attention all my life 

Blessed are the peacemakers 

For they will be called sons of God

Too many nights have come with

Unresolved conflict as my bedfellow

Blessed are those who are persecuted for righteousness

For they will inherit the kingdom of God

My desire for safety and comfort has far 

Outweighed my willingness to accept this blessing 

So where do I fit Lord--what is my blessing?

Might there be one just for me and those like me

How about blessed are the tormented, the doubters 

And those who struggle with sleep  

The ones who dread the dark of night 

Where imaginings are worst 

What about the fearful and those that worry despite 

All the pleading to not and to trust that You are there 

Even when the sound of your own heart is all you hear

Is there a blessing for those that struggle with waiting

For the “peace that transcends all understanding”

For joy and for justice and for 

Your coming which will make all of this well

Or perhaps it is for those that believe--- without seeing 

The ones that struggle with that

Maybe that’s me...Isn’t that all of us??

The ones that you told in the Upper Room—with Thomas

When he doubted and you put his doubts to rest.

And then said what you said. To him. 

It has to be that. Battled, beleaguered, struggling

Always wanting proof…

In all my failings, in all my rants, in the midst of not seeing 

Your grace... available for me, for all of us.